The Basics will Suffice

So I am going on Date Number 3 on Thursday, but until then, please indulge me in this post about a huge pet peeve that I need to get off my chest: spelling and grammatical errors.

I appreciate the fact that type-os occur often and I acknowledge that I have made my share from time to time and if you look hard enough in this blog you will realize that my grammar is by no means perfect. However, the ability to put together a sentence that is basically grammatically correct is essential to attract me to your online dating profile for the following reasons: (i) it shows me that you are not a complete idiot; (ii) the entire point of putting up a profile is to grab people's attention with your words; (iii) it shows that you have at least taken the time to proof read and put forth your best image, and (iv) it shows that you are not too effing lazy to use the freaking spell check button. 

So, lets go back to elementary school for a moment and review a few lessons. 

1) Knowledge of the difference between "your" and "you're" is a must.  YOU'RE a lazy person for not using spell check on YOUR profile.

2) Also essential is knowing the difference between "to" and "too".  I am going TO kill myself and you TOO if I have to read another grammatical error on your profile.   

3) Possibly the most irritating and by far the most laziest mistake is the refusal of some people to capitalize "I".  The word, "I", must be capitalized every single time, not just at the beginning of a sentence.

4) Along the same lines as number 3, I've noticed a lot of people have a tendency to capitalize random words in the middle of their sentences.  I just don't understand it.  Why?  Can someone please tell me why BIGD_01 thinks that the following sentence is acceptable: "I am born and raised canadiana nd i love it here in canada I am Down to earth, good listener, and a good person."  I really don't care how good of a person you are if you don't know that "Canada" and "I" should be capitalized, while "down" should not be. 

5) Another valuable skill is knowing the difference between using an "s" to pluralize a noun and using an "s" to show possession. 

6) Knowledge of the difference between "its" and "it's" is also an asset.  I know this is a tricky one, but you can learn from the following example: IT'S irritating as all hell when people don't know the very basic elements of English grammar.  The spell check button is your friend.  ITS function is to make you look smarter than you are.

7) Also impressive is knowing the difference between "were", "we're" and "where".  Although they may look similar, each of them means something completely different.  For instance, "WE'RE getting annoyed because the words on your profile WERE all spelled incorrectly.  WHERE did you go to school?", demonstrates their proper use.

8) Also different are the words "than" and "then".  Take note, if your spelling is better THAN mine, THEN you may e-mail me.

9) And if you really want to impress me, you can show me that you know that "a lot" is two separate words and "always" is one, as are "someone" and "something".

The thing that gets me is that almost every person describes themselves as intelligent on their profiles, while many of them can't construct a coherent sentence.  I know there is more to intelligence than proper spelling, but if you don't know that a period goes at the end of a sentence then at the very least, don't comment on how smart you are.  How can I trust anything else on your profile?

An interesting tactic was used by Likes2Like4U (gross name, I know), who readily admitted to "suking" at spelling on his profile, and fully lived up to this statement with words like "activityes", "bin" (aka "been"), "colective", "buisness", "listining", "susport", "wil", "harted", and "nessary".  He also confused the words "prospective" with "perspective" and "were" with "where".  The real interesting part of his profile was that his justification for his poor spelling is that he types too fast.  I sincerely doubt this accounts for his atrocious spelling, but even if I give him the benefit of the doubt, what is his justification for being too god damned lazy to proof read or hit the spell check button?

So here is the basic process for writing a profile:
1) Type what you want to say
2) Proof read and edit for spelling and grammar
3) Hit the spell check button to pick up on anything you may have missed in Step 2

If you are unsure if you used a word properly, www.dictionary.com is a helpful website I use all the time. 

I don't think Dallas0 did any of the above three steps, as I don't even understand what he means by "I am humorus, spontanious, and layedbac. ... i love the classics more than anything but as long as it can hold my interestes im good and lots of mags".




CorazonDelator: "I am objective and i know what i want, i'm a fighter person, never surrender i always try to give the 101%, do my best efforts. I want someone who aprecciates those values, so i will do the same on her, she must be honest, reliable, tender, have family values. I am a kind of old-fashioned when it comes to dating. i am so respectful. Have you ever dating on a kitchen?"